GIVE ME A CHANCE!!!!!
Dec 29, 2019
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6TgFvBRLPm8

hey you guys welcome back to my channel
and if you're new welcome to my channel
thank you for joining in today I hope
everybody had an amazing date as well as
I did I did a lot of things to prepare
for this challenge that I'm gonna be
starting in just a few short days and
it's not just a challenge it's my life
change and I've heard some people say
well why are you waiting until the first
why not do it right now because you know
there are things that I need to prepare
mentally for and I think I need to
prepare physically for and I don't want
to run into a situation where because I
rush to start something and not prepare
myself and when I say prepares because
when you're going into a major change
like this there are things that you have
to modify you have to you know change
around in your home and so for me that's
why I thought that starting on the 1st
of the year would be a great time
because that's when we will be doing our
you know shopping for the month and
things like that so I can also be able
to build up my choices of food during
that time when we're doing our grocery
shopping and stuff like that so anyways
that's kind of why I have waited to
start until the first because I just
wanted to prepare everything and not be
where because I rushed I'm stuck with a
situation that may cause me to buckle
and you know fill out so that is that
and that is why I've waited um anyways
you guys it's getting so close and I'm
so excited I am so ready for these
changes and I've been ready for a long
time but it's been the encouragement and
I think - it's been the support from
many of you guys that have allowed me to
want to do this and really drive myself
to do this even more I know that I need
to do this for myself but sometimes it's
helpful when you have people rallying
behind you and saying you can do this
and you will do this get up and let's
let's start so that's kind of why I am
doing what I'm doing
I will be doing today I'm working on a
what I eat in a day video I'm not gonna
say it's typically what I eat in a day
it's just what I've chosen to eat today
as I'm filming
I will not film me eating the food but I
will be showing you everything that I
have chosen to eat today and I also will
put how many calories I racked for each
of those choices and that way we can
tell ate up at the very end of tomorrow
our today's video for tomorrow so you
guys can kind of get a grips of what
I've been eating and then also I will be
throughout this entire time now is going
into my next phase of life I will be
showing you guys more of what I am
eating I may join you guys and let you
guys be a part of me not MUC banging
because that's not what I'm gonna do but
I can also show you guys how I prepare
the mills how I you know do those type
of things so that is that and that's
what I have been working on today which
is really hard because I'll get going
I'll forget oh no I was supposed to film
this so mostly everything that I have
gotten on film is either what I was
gonna eat or what I will be eating so
fYI on that part so last night i sat for
a little bit and I really wanted to
think of some goals that I want to
accomplish within these three first
months of our challenge and there's many
many things that I want to accomplish
and be able to do from here on out for
the rest of my life but I also know that
I have to start somewhere and I don't
want to overwhelm myself with a whole
bunch of goals that I can't probably I'm
not gonna be able to reach all of those
goals within the first three months like
it's just not gonna happen this is
something that is gonna to obviously
take a while I didn't become over 400
pounds overnight and I'm not gonna get
under 400 pounds in a week and I'm not
gonna reach all of my goals in three
months six months and even maybe
possibly a year so I know that there's a
lot of things that
I have on my goal list but I really
wanted to pick out things that I really
wanted to reach like that I could read
like do it in reality like what would be
the real things that I could reach in a
three-month span for my first set of
goals and so as I sat and I looked over
my list and I really was putting into
play my life and the things that I want
to see myself accomplish is the first
one is I want to really learn how to
have confidence confidence that I can
achieve this that I will be able to
achieve this confidence that I can get
up and I can work out and I'm not gonna
have a heart attack just because I'm you
know having some movement because that's
a major fear of mine is that what if I
start moving too much and my heart
starts pumping really hard and then I
have a heart attack because my heart
can't take it like that's one of my
biggest fears and I just need to learn
to have confidence that that's not gonna
happen that the only way that my heart's
gonna build strong is if I continue to
keep pushing myself out of that comfort
zone and it's not easy I mean I don't
think that anybody finds working out
always easy you know I mean you're
always gonna work past a a feeling of
you are going to probably pass out but
that's where your body's really actually
getting the the real feel and just
confidence within my own personality my
own person my channel my mothering mom
me being a wife having confidence that I
am striving to be the best that I can be
do I fall short sometimes absolutely I
do but I'm a human being and we all fall
short at times but it doesn't mean just
because I fall short that it means I
have to give up and it just means to
brush my knees and continue to go
because again this is all a learning
process so the first one would be
confidence the next one is obviously a
very big one and that's weight loss I
want to see a big a big number change I
have set a goal weight for myself to
achieve for my first three months
but I'm going to keep that part private
for right now not because I don't want
to share those things with anybody
because I do but I think there is a few
things that I need to kind of keep a
little bit on the down-low and just know
in my own personal self what my goal for
weight-loss for my first three months is
gonna be um that's kind of where I'm
standing at this point is knowing that
there is a certain amount of weight that
I'm pushing for and as long as I'm
losing that's better than anything but
that's not gonna be good enough for me
because I really want to see some major
changes on the numbers on not just the
scale but just in what we're gonna go
into the next one is in dependency and
mobility and when I put in dependency is
I want to be able to go to the store and
not be dependent on a scooter I want to
be able to clean my home and not feel
like I have to have a chair behind me
because I'm afraid my back's just gonna
give out and I'm gonna have to sit down
I want to be able to do my home tours
and do them all at one time and not have
to break it in you know throughout days
just so I can reach all my chores
because I I never feel like I
accomplished anything in a day because I
only accomplish so much of my chore
before my body is just like bump done
and I don't want to be that way I really
want to be able to get in there scrub my
home and feel good when I sit down in
the evening time like okay my house is
clean my house is good I've accomplished
this we did it and also in dependency
with the showering and being able to not
lean on my husband as much to help me
when it comes to certain things because
as of right now I have leaned on him a
lot and that's not his job to be my
caretaker like I don't want him to be my
caretaker
I am only 38 years old there is no
reason I should have a caretaker right
now unless I had a physical disability
that literally
put me in a wheelchair and I was
paralyzed from the neck down or
something then I can needed you know a
caretaker but when in 2004 I had a
stroke and I remember I was really in
good health at that time I mean I was
working two jobs and you're probably
thinking good health and you had a
stroke
I suffer from silent migraines and then
also on top of that I was going through
some major changes within my living
situation and I was working just about
16 hours a day between going to beauty
school and working a full-time job my
body was just worn out and I wasn't
eating healthy I was eating on the go
because I didn't have time to even stop
and you know anything proper I would
leave the house by 6:30 in the morning I
wouldn't even get home until sometimes
11:00 11:30 at night I literally would
walk in the door see my aunt sitting on
the couch I'd say good night I'd walk in
go take my shower and I go straight to
bed and I never ate or anything because
my body was just so exhausted so 2004 I
did suffer a minor stroke and I had some
paralysis for a while but because I was
determined to not have those things be a
control on my body I did lots of
physical therapy I had a nurse coming to
the home three times a week to do
physical therapy with me in the home I
was using a walker for probably about
three months just because they wanted to
make sure that I had all my balancing
right but other than that I mean I built
back up my body and I don't really
notice it anymore once in a very very
blue moon if I am really exhausted or my
back is just wanting to give out my
right side of my body starts to get a
little bit hmm
just a little bit weak and that's
because of that but it's very far and in
between do I fill any of that but I mean
I could have allowed that stroke to take
over my entire life but I had determined
and I had I had a goal to become
independent again I didn't want people
taking care of me and that's
the same as I want to be now I don't
want anybody to have to take care of me
I totally want to be 100% my the
caretaker to my children to my husband
to my home and to myself and so those
are my three goals for the first three
months is gaining confidence having my
weight loss and gaining independency
because those three things I think will
open up so many doors if I can
accomplish those three in the first
three months so that's my three goals I
am going to I wrote it down on a piece
of paper but I am going to be making a
wall for my kind of like wait it's I
guess you could call like a vision board
but it's more like a vision wall because
I want to really work on like
affirmations and things that can really
stick out at me and I'm gonna put it
where I can see it and still you know
not where it's gonna take over my home
but where I go and I can see it and I
can recognize certain things that might
stick out to me if I'm having a really
hard day and it's just like one of those
days you just want to throw the towel
and going back in reading some of those
affirmations looking at pictures of what
I used to look like to what I look like
today what I want to look like what I
want to accomplish those things will
continue to keep pushing me forward and
also I will be going back and when I
can't and I need to I can go back on my
videos and watch them and say hey this
is you know this is the past Amy that
was talking and I don't want to be that
person anymore I don't want to have to
be talking about this but I want to
actually be doing it and that's why I'm
not at this point in my life and so I
did want to show you - it's kind of
messy I did it with a permanent marker
but I don't know what happened just like
stayed kind of wet but show it to you
this way
if you guys can see that it's a weight
chart has January February March is on
the back it has the total like what my
current weight is gonna be what my total
weight is and then I put all the dates
on it so like right here like these
all the Wednesdays so the first eight
fifteen twenty second twenty ninth those
are all the Wednesdays and so I'll put
my current weight and then the total is
how much I lost for that week so that
way I can go ahead and keep that oh yeah
here's March it's but see right where
did it go somewhere I goofed it and I
like total oh right here on the winter
part yeah because I have winner is and
that's for the first three months so
anyways that's that I also wanted to
bring up again we have talked about a
couple different times kind of what my
goals and what not just my goals but
what the rules are gonna be for this
challenge and I know there's been some
changes and I know that we've I've said
a few things and then I've gone back and
I've changed a little bit
I've had people bring it up to my
attention a few concerns that they had
and I guess I never really thought about
all of the concerns or the things that
could be a possible during this
challenge and one was because I thought
that it would be kind of a fun idea to
give back to a few people just giving
our channel a chance for people on my
channel to win and that way I'm winning
by the amount of weight I'm losing but
you guys are winning by gaining the
money that I've lost now I've had a few
people say okay but also why are you
going to give away money when money is
very tight I mean it's tight for
everybody don't just type for me it's
time for everybody not everybody lives
you know not too many people live freely
you know most people do live check to
check or very close to it and I really
got thinking about I thought you know
that is very true but I would like to
still do something to bring you guys
into this and have you guys be also a
part of this challenge because I want
everybody to be involved so because it
was brought to my attention
by a few people that they really think
that it's not a better idea
to be doing the money challenge where I
am putting money in a jar to give away
to people for the amount of weight that
I've lost because it just looks very
irresponsible and I guess I didn't put
it that way I didn't think of it in that
manner if anything my heart was just in
the in the I was just wanting everybody
to be a part and to be able to feel like
they are a part of this and I know that
everybody that's on this channel that is
here for the good reason or for the good
reasons that are here for the right
reasons will be here no matter what
because they are the ones that truly are
supporting me and I know I have multiple
multiple thousands right now of lurkers
and that's okay I it doesn't does not
bother me whatsoever but I think after
it was brought to my attention I think
that it is kind of maybe not the best
idea to do that so what I was thinking
of doing is for every pound I lose I
will still take a dollar out but at the
end of three months that money that I
gained I will be able to use that and
put it towards some more workout
equipment and things like that that will
help better because at some point once I
can start getting on the floor and
getting back up I really would like to
start doing like yoga and I've never
done yoga but it looks so relaxing but I
also have to lose enough weight that I
can get down on the floor and get back
up and not hurt my knees because right
now I just couldn't do it because
putting that much pressure on my knees I
would I would scream but I do definitely
want to start doing that stuff once I
lose enough weight so I would like to
get like the yoga ball and you know yoga
bat and things like that so that I was
thinking maybe that would be something
that would be kind of a better idea put
your ideas down in the comments below
what you guys would suggest if you want
me to continue to do the money giveaway
let me know I don't want to change this
on everybody be like okay we're changing
everything day before the challenge
starts but at the same time I want to
do what's most responsible when I'm
doing this challenge however even though
me and Jen are we're doing this
competition against each other fun it's
not like we're doing it negative but she
is doing what she wants to do on her
channel when it comes to like the rules
and stuff like she's donating money to
charities which i think is an amazing
idea however I'm not in a place that I
can do all of that I can only do so much
so that's why I was like okay well I can
do the money to my you know supporters
that want to join in on the challenge
and be a part of it
but I can't afford to do all of that so
that's where it's kind of like we are
doing our separate things when it's that
she has her way of getting people
involved in how she's gonna have people
joining the challenge and vice versa so
that part were separate on the only part
that we're pretty much combined on is
we're weighing ourselves you know and
we're starting the same day but like the
choice of how she's gonna lose the
weight is on her own and how I'm going
to do mine is on my own
I will not participate in keto I've had
that brought up to me a few times I
cannot do I get kidney stones horribly
and my doctor has made it very clear to
me that I cannot do keto because of too
much protein I will have kidney stones
up to eight and it's not even it's not
worth it to me
so for me I'm not gonna do keto and but
that doesn't mean just because she's
doing keto that she's wrong or I'm wrong
it's just what's gonna work for
ourselves and for me a life a lifetime
eating plan for me is watching my
calories and also lowering my carbs but
not taking them completely out so that's
kind of where we're standing on that
part I do think that this is all in all
going to be an amazing challenge no
matter what because it's watching two
people change before your eyes
please give us a chance that's one thing
that I'm gonna ask please don't jump
conclusions just because maybe we have
failed at one time before two times
before a hundred times before or other
you know youtubers have failed before us
let us have a chance to prove to you
that we're we're ready to lose and hold
ourselves individually don't hold one
above the other just because one has
done things others haven't let us both
have a chance to build ourselves and to
also lose ourselves by losing our weight
we both have other reasons for why we
want to lose the weight and I think both
of us have great reasons and you know so
yeah anyways and one last thing let's
let's talk about this my nose is it you
okay I've had this brought up a lot and
it's not something I feel like I have to
even address but why not right so I had
a lot of people say that ring is fake
that ring is for yes yes it is fake my
ring that I wear which is this one is
fake it came from a company called Julia
the band's kind of off but that's the
first ring that the company gave me to
do a review on and the second one was
this one you can see because the light
and the reason I have not worn this ring
is because when I got this ring I
ordered it in a size I want to say it
was an 11 and when I put it on it was
just way too big but my fingers
fluctuate horeb like if I'm gonna lose
water weight or whatever first it's
gonna be in my hands my hands are my
biggest place that I lose weight like
quick so this is the first ring but it
like if I start moving it it's just
honestly it's gonna fall off so I didn't
feel comfortable wearing this one I
could actually go and I could go get it
sized but I just choose not to but this
one when they had me order
another ring I ordered a size down which
is a 10 no this is a 10 and a half and
that's why this one fits me really well
because it's a 10 and a half now the
band that I wear with this ring is my
real wedding band this is the band that
I wear all the time I never take this
band off this is a size 10 but it's very
small so that is why I can slip that
ring on my finger and it be okay now
this is my actual wedding ring you guys
can see that sorry okay I have it came
are we purchased two bands which is this
band right here in this van but we had
one soldered because when I was pregnant
I was trying to wear my ring but one of
the bands because they were not soldered
together would slip off my finger
because the ring is very thick and so it
would slip off my finger and I was just
like oh my gosh I don't want to take the
chance of ever losing my vans right so
we put one solder together so that one
is always worn on the outside so it's
stuck together with the ring and then I
have my band which I wear at all times
now this ring right here is a size 10
because it is a very thick band if you
look because it is a very thick band it
is tight on my finger so if I was to put
my whole wedding ring on there is my
band
there is my wedding ring that is my
world real wedding ring this is the one
that yes cost me and my husband $14,000
yes it's $14,000 for this ring you guys
have said multiple times again how you
know we I wear and it's very heavy and
thick I mean it's not a joke of a ring
and I keep it in my
because I'm I'm like I said it's a very
expensive ring how'd that walk out my
door somewhere I would be devastated I
mean it's covered under warranties but
still and insurances but yes this ring
is my wedding ring and this is the ring
that I just don't wear because like I
said it is too tight on my finger and
when I say that it can't be sized more
than twice is because if they were to
pull this out the diamonds that set in
here I know my cameras are showing it
set in here will start to loosen up so
they suggest they didn't say I could not
but they suggest not to have it sized
more than twice in its lifetime because
moving the band around like that will
loosen the diamonds I'm not gonna take
the chances about one of my diamonds
fall out even though it's covered I'm
not gonna take the chances of having one
of my diamonds fall out just because I
want to get it sized multiple times to
fit my finger when I know that
ultimately my goal is to lose enough
weight to wear my ring and when I lose
all of my weight then and I get down to
the goal that I want to be at a hundred
percent then I will get my ring sized
for one and for all time and leave it at
that so anyways I just want to show you
guys yes I do have a real wedding ring
yes I wore my fake one but that's again
because it fits better and then because
this band is smaller but thinner it
still fits great but like I said if I
was to put both are like my whole
wedding ring on see my fingers are too
tight right now but then they're like
once I start losing a little bit of
weight my fingers will go down
completely and then it gets to the point
where it's so loose it's like falling
off my finger and you'll see that within
the next couple of weeks you'll see my
fingers go down first and I'll put my
wedding ring right back on but it's
during the time that I'm so swollen that
I can't do it and it's not comfortable
it's pinching so that's why I don't like
wearing if you notice my fingers all red
I don't like wearing my wedding ring and
bless my fingers are a little bit less
swollen so anyways I am gonna close
because I need to go and finish up the
rest of what I need to do for this
evening I'm gonna get this video edited
and put up I hope you guys had a
wonderful wonderful day again and I will
see you guys bright and shiny tomorrow
bye bye